MY PRECIOUS ANGEL

From the day that you were born and I held you very close,

 I knew in my joyful heart that you are my precious angel.

You are you my precious angel.

and I love you my special little girl.

O God, please remember that it is my little girl's birthday.

Memories don't go away

Year's don't take away the joy you have brought

or the sadness I feel to see you like this.(bed ridden)

I miss your voice, 

I miss your laughter, 

O baby can you hear me?

I hope there is a miracle.

Get well soon and we will play.

with all your toys and friends all day.

You will have so much fun.

I'll make sure there is lots of sun.

You will chose what to do.

My heart still aches with sadness.

My silent tears still flow.

No one really knows.

My mind is filled with thoughts of you.

they say that life is a healer,

and that life has to go on.

But my life will never be the same again
I promise to be always on your side
Until the final breath I take
No matter how old you are I am.

I want to be the best mom I can be to you. 

You mean the world to me.

happy Birthday.

GOD WHERE IS JUSTICE IN YOUR COURT

Read about Aruna Shanbhage's passing away after being in coma for 42 years. So much suffering her body must have endured I just cannot imagine.The person responsible for her condition was left free after imprisonment for 7 years only. God where is justice in your court.

GETTING TOO MUCH SLEEP

There is renovation going on the Sri Venkataramana Temple and my husband is one of the committee members of renovation commitee. I didnt go to any of the temple functions because it takes a lot of time. My husband taunted me saying because you don't believe in God these things happen. I told him. God is everywhere and I need not go to temples to please God that is what my mom believed and I believed too. Before Sushmi's coma stage I used to go to temple to sing bhajans and I loved doing so. Now if i leave Sushmi and sing Bhajans I feel god will not like it. our Karma itself our God.
I am getting too much sleep these days.I cannot control my sleep at all.

 

WHAT WILL I DO

There are many changes in our life. My son got married. But Sushmithas condition remains the same.Future looks very scary to me. My husband always so  busy with his social work he is not at all concentrating on business.He is not in the shop at all.why he is not worrying for Sushmitha I don't know.What will I do?

JUNE 23rd MOST UNFATEFUL DAY IN OUR LIFE

Today is the day I cannot forget in my life. Today is the day my Sushmi went in to coma. She went into another world. I   just don't want to share my grief with anybody. My son's marriage is fixed on december 12 th. I got my car exchanged and got a new car. This things does not matter anymore although I am happy for my son. He has almost got the job but not 100 percent.

YOU ARE THE MOST PRECIOUS GIFT GOD HAS EVER GIVEN

I look into your eyes each morning and thank God you are mine. Not only  you are my beginning you are my end of time. I could never have imagined my heart to feel this amount of love and pride you gave me so much to live for, You are the reason I wake up each day, you are what makes my life worth living, You are the most precious gift God has ever given.

ASSURING MOTHER I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR HER

Mother went for check up once again. Gastro doctor told her she has to take steriods to fight liver problem. But that would increase diabetes. So insulin dosage and number has to be increased. She suddenly looked weak. I assured her that everything would be allright. I would stand by her no matter what the situation is. I am doing everything for Sushmitha and I would do anything and everything for her. I am ready to bath her and wash her and clean her incase she is bed ridden not that she will be. I told her that she has done everything for us. She sacrificed many things. She reared  cows. She stiched dresses and gave the tailoring money to me which I will never forget.Daddy was working in a bank and we were middle class. During my marriage mom went groom searching herself. During my second sisters marriage she gave up her evey jewellery because her marriage took place immediately after mine. After my Child Sushmitha went to coma it was mummy who supported throught. Sometimes she is very frank and very outspoken and sometimes this hurts. But she is very strong woman and may the difficulties she faced single handedly made her srtrong and harsh Even Anitha my sister sent one lakh rupees and told her she would not worryfinancially. Even I told her I would also help her and I did even though she was reluctant to accept any favour. Now it is my turn mummy.