MOTHERS HEALTH CONDITION GETTING WORSE

Mom is a very strong woman. Even liver cirhosis seemed not to be effecting her. She was cooking, going out doing my bank jobs and other works. I was concentrating on Sushmitha alone. Now she seems to have fluid accumlation in the leg and stomach(ascites). She was given direutics daily. She seemed to get better so they lessened the tablets. Again now there is more accumlation and she is sleeping all day. She has stopped taking eggs which is very important for hr liver problem. She has lost apetite and taste. She forgets things now. I don't know what to do. She used to shout and get mad at people still she was a strong rock like support to me. I feel so helpless not being able to anything. I am seeing to her diet so that she has all the foods she should eat. She is restricted from all the salty foods and only limited amount of water to drink. 

MY PRECIOUS ANGEL

From the day that you were born and I held you very close,

 I knew in my joyful heart that you are my precious angel.

You are you my precious angel.

and I love you my special little girl.

O God, please remember that it is my little girl's birthday.

Memories don't go away

Year's don't take away the joy you have brought

or the sadness I feel to see you like this.(bed ridden)

I miss your voice, 

I miss your laughter, 

O baby can you hear me?

I hope there is a miracle.

Get well soon and we will play.

with all your toys and friends all day.

You will have so much fun.

I'll make sure there is lots of sun.

You will chose what to do.

My heart still aches with sadness.

My silent tears still flow.

No one really knows.

My mind is filled with thoughts of you.

they say that life is a healer,

and that life has to go on.

But my life will never be the same again
I promise to be always on your side
Until the final breath I take
No matter how old you are I am.

I want to be the best mom I can be to you. 

You mean the world to me.

happy Birthday.

GOD WHERE IS JUSTICE IN YOUR COURT

Read about Aruna Shanbhage's passing away after being in coma for 42 years. So much suffering her body must have endured I just cannot imagine.The person responsible for her condition was left free after imprisonment for 7 years only. God where is justice in your court.

GETTING TOO MUCH SLEEP

There is renovation going on the Sri Venkataramana Temple and my husband is one of the committee members of renovation commitee. I didnt go to any of the temple functions because it takes a lot of time. My husband taunted me saying because you don't believe in God these things happen. I told him. God is everywhere and I need not go to temples to please God that is what my mom believed and I believed too. Before Sushmi's coma stage I used to go to temple to sing bhajans and I loved doing so. Now if i leave Sushmi and sing Bhajans I feel god will not like it. our Karma itself our God.
I am getting too much sleep these days.I cannot control my sleep at all.

 

WHAT WILL I DO

There are many changes in our life. My son got married. But Sushmithas condition remains the same.Future looks very scary to me. My husband always so  busy with his social work he is not at all concentrating on business.He is not in the shop at all.why he is not worrying for Sushmitha I don't know.What will I do?

JUNE 23rd MOST UNFATEFUL DAY IN OUR LIFE

Today is the day I cannot forget in my life. Today is the day my Sushmi went in to coma. She went into another world. I   just don't want to share my grief with anybody. My son's marriage is fixed on december 12 th. I got my car exchanged and got a new car. This things does not matter anymore although I am happy for my son. He has almost got the job but not 100 percent.

YOU ARE THE MOST PRECIOUS GIFT GOD HAS EVER GIVEN

I look into your eyes each morning and thank God you are mine. Not only  you are my beginning you are my end of time. I could never have imagined my heart to feel this amount of love and pride you gave me so much to live for, You are the reason I wake up each day, you are what makes my life worth living, You are the most precious gift God has ever given.