SLEEPING CONTINUOUSLY FROM FIFTEEN DAYS

Sushmitha has loose motion from fifteen days. And she is sleeping continuously. I went to our old house and got some old snaps of Sushmitha.I feel very sad.  I wish I can rewind the past.But sometimes things are not in our hands.Nobody can do anything.My sister Anitha says the only thing now I can do is love her unconditionally. Tell  her baby I will love you the same in whatever condition you remain.She says Sushmitha has come in her dreams and begging her to let her go because life here is very difficult for her. At some point may be one day you have to be prepared to let her go she says. She says she might be holding on to life because I am holding on to her.She asks Geethakka imagine yourself in that situation. Think of hte sufferring she is going through and she says I should not be selfish to want her in this situation. I tell her I don't know what is right or wrong but she has fought for her life to be with me so I will stand by her.I tell her after this situation I cannot love other children. Geethakka you are angry at the whole world. and the people will surely understand you she says. The other day I heard about a baby abandoned by his or her mother. I sometimes think how a mother can be so cruel or what circumstances might have led her to do that. Because mother is a  mother after all. 

Loose motion again affecting Sushmitha's alertness

There seems as if there is no end to Sushmi's problems. Suddenly there was loose motion without any reason.She passed motion nearly ten to fifteen times. So every feed was diluted to avoid dehydration.Mornings I and Laxmi together we cleaned her soiled clothes before giving for final wash.Even Shilpa our new part time help joined us. One day night full she was awake and passed motion many times and I am accustomed to wash soiled clothes immediately. So I was washing and going out alone because duty of Laxmi ends at !2 at night. She was moaning whole night. I think she had stomach ache also. Because slowly massaging her stomach she seemed to be better. By tomorrow if she is not better I will contact Dr Pushpa KIni.I have already given Entergermina tablets for three days,

INDIFFERENCE OF PEOPLE TO OTHERS PROBLEMS.

I went to Udupi to meet Sushmithas former nurse who wanted to come back again to take care of Susmitha.While coming back we were near Guddeangadi. we had crossed Hiriyadka.On the way we saw a car which was upside down. I looked as though it just happened. Because by the time we stopped the car to help them two local men also rushed to help. Together we lifted the car and made it erect.Driver was brides groom and he was married the previous day and they were dropping  some guests to karkala.Thankfully bride was not there. There were two women and two men and one lady was hurt on the head.They phoned he ambulance and learnt it would take long time to arrive.They requested the vehicles who stopped to take them to Manipal but no body agreed.I remembered Dr pushpa kini's words if you can do difference in other peoples life then we should do it. This is another God's work. He just gives a chance to help other people.So I told them I can give them a lift.By that time the woman who was hurt on the head was talking and she was still bleeding but she looked okay. So they told me to drop till Hiriadka and so they got it our car and we dropped them to Hiriyadka Hospital.They Thanked us and I decided to go back as one sister was already attending the woman and she told the doctor would arrive shortly.       I am surprised at the unhuman tendency of people to others problems. Because tomorrow they can be in that situation. They should do atleast waht they could because however they were going that way and it would cost them nothing.                                                                

I STRONGLY BELIEVE SUSHMITHA CAN PERCIEVE WHAT IS GOING ON AROUND HER TO SOME EXTENT.

I believe Sushmitha can percieve what is going around her to some extent but not really able to communicate in a way we believe. I know it is tough for her to remain like this and not being able to express anything. Not being able to say where it pains her or she is hungry If you haven't been in coma you wouldn't know exactly how you feel  about living like this.It is only loving your daughter and preserving life no matter what.Because there are instances where people come out of comatose state Again I know it is hypoxic brain injury and the chances are very minimum. May be it is 0.00000001%.She responds to touch and voices. She bites sugarcane.She licks lollipop. She drinks coffee. She follows mirror, people and visual toys.She startles at sudden noises. Her sensory reflex is good. She can feel pain.She resists nubulisation by shaking her head. She opens her eyes for urination  even in deep sleep.Yesterday there was a fly sitting on her nose and she was in deep sleep. She was irritated and shaking her head.But it is very difficult for her when she has sputam and she cannot bring it out.She coughs many times.We give nubulisation and I think all the secretions get collected and when we give vibrations above chest we  can hear the sound. Again give gentle vibrations for secretions to become loose then give moderate hot water to drink.So that if there are thick secretions they come out. I just pray to God to be able to treat her the best way. I will never ask for anything. My husband is encountering lot of problems in his business. I tell him we should never give up because we have to be strong for Sushmitha. I give him the example of Satya Harishchandra. We are not great like the king but atleast we should never give up. Her sleep wake cycle is also constantly changing and she is remaining awake at night.I am not able to sleep because she has choriform movements again and she takes her head up and she cannot bring it down.

SUSHMITHA MY DAY BEGINS WITH YOU-MORNING, AFTERNOON AND NIGHT

Sushmitha has improved visually.Her right side seeing is better now. Today she turned neck and was seeing both sides. There is so much happiness on small improvements.I also know these improvements do not remain for long..She sees me going upstairs that too in sitting position which was difficult before. I just want to increase her visual feild so that she can see everything going around her and thus make her aware of her surroundings. I give her fast tracking by going up then coming down and going backdoor then call from window then going around bed.But It is very difficult to see her cough.I had a visitor in our house and she asked innumerable questions. She asked me whether she can eat and whether she can turn over and whether she can hold objects. I told her if she asks more questions I feel difficult because  I have to say she cannot do these things.I never like to probe into somebodys problems. We should if only they want to share it with us or if it helps them.

CONCENTRATING MORE ON PHYSIOTHERAPY THAN ON STIMULATIONS FOR NOW .

I am concentrating  more on physiotherapy than on stimulation for now. Because She had a severe chest infenction and I have to take care it does not happen again. Lower lung left lung collapse is certainly not a small issue. By going through internet I feel bronchoscopy is done to inflate collapsed lung. Now coming home she still has cough. Her physiotherapist Dr watson sir tells me that she should not be allowed to lie down long..Continuos movements are what required now or else she will have relapse of chest infection.So I focus more on nubulisation, chest PT, standing, rolling,upper limb movements. Inspite of giving all these there seems no end to these secretions.Morning to afternoon she sleeps and she looks ok. but after 3 PM again secretions get collected. I can hear different sound in her breathing when secretions get collected. So we start nubulisation so that secretions soften and then we give chest PT and then vibration near diaphram. we also give rolling and upper limb movements. We also give. neck flection along with standing. After giving all these movements She gets cough. If she is sitting I immediately bring her forward and tilt her head down.She brings out he sections. Sometimes they are thick. When I informed Sushmithas doctor Dr Pushpa Kini she told me to give duolin nubulisation and start 4 hourly nubulisation.She seems much better now.She also has rectal wound and I am applying drez after consulting doctor.If within a week if that does not heal I have to inform doctor or else it might turn into bed sore.I am also maintaining oral hygiene by brushing her teeth twice a day.Once in the morning and then during bath.Her Coffee drinking seems to have improved. I just hold the glass and she sucks coffee.If she likes something she will drink making sound. Today her rice eating was better and I am happy for her.